Living a Focused Life
The Balanced Life
For Thousands of years people have been trying to discover the secret to create a balance between work and life. Myself included, I must admit that I have read hundreds of books and articles on creating a balanced life and many of them were pretty good and they gave me great insight on how to handle certain issues in my life. However, none of them are completely conclusive on how to actually create a balance between work and life. And the reason is because there is no such thing as a balanced life. You see when we think about a balanced life there is this mental picture that life and work are on these scales and with the right strategies we can even them out and life will be Zen. Well, here’s the deal, our work and life are not meant to be evenly balanced, and it never was, What we can create, however, is a proper counter-balanced life. And we achieve this by having a centered or focused life.
You see, A balanced life requires you to be everywhere at the same time, and although cloning is tempting, it’s not possible. And even if it were I don’t know if I’d want 2 or 3 of me running around. I have enough challenges just dealing with one of me. A balanced life requires you to be a great multi-tasker, and you know what,…you’re not a great multi-tasker, even though you think you are. Listen, There is no such thing as a great multi-tasker, there are only multi shifters. You shift over here, then you shift over there. Now I know some of you are going to give me backlash, especially some of you who have been praised for doing more than one thing at a time. But when you really look at it you are only doing one thing at a time and then shifting over to something else very quickly. All this really accomplishes is a bunch of unfinished projects or as my colleague Brendon Burchard puts it “half dug holes.”
Trying to multi task your life doesn’t actually help you create balance, on the contrary, it creates stress, it dampens your creativity, and it slows you down. So what I want to share with you today is how you can accomplish every goal, finish your projects, and live at your greatest potential consistently in every area of your life. And you can achieve this by living a focused life. Not a balance life, as I explained earlier there is no such thing as a balanced life, but we can have a centered and focused life. And you achieve this by first knowing what you want.
1.You must know what you want. If you don't know what you want then you wont know where you’re going and you are destined to Rome the wilderness of life while never making it to your promised land. It is essential that you find clarity about what you want In life so that you can begin targeting your attention in the right direction. You want to do more than just be satisfied with hitting the board but you want to hit the bulls-eye.
So You need to know
1.Know what you want in life
2.Know what you want at work
3.Know your long term goal
4.Know your short term goals
I teach my coaching clients how to create 1 year goals and 6month goals, but I consistently remind them to make goals everyday that they can achieve. As a part of my daily rituals I pray, I remind myself what I’m grateful for like; my family, my finances, or simply being able to breathe, and finally I write down three goals that I plan to accomplish today. Writing down your goals or ideas is one of the quickest ways to knowing what you really want because it helps you to organize your thoughts. Often times the ideas in our head don't make as much, however when we write them down we have an opportunity to reorganize, create, and strategically think about what it is we want and what we're trying to do. You see, Writing down our goals and ideas gives us clarity on our direction. You may also discover a road map to new ideas or a more focused plan of action. Without writing things down, we could miss a small but very significant idea that we should be pursuing.
Once you take a survey of your life and really determine what you want, and start to write down your goals with clarity you can begin the process of working through what it will take to make those goals a reality. Most importantly you will bring focus to your “Main Thing”.
2. the second thing you need to have a focused life is belief in yourself.
You have to belief that whatever the task is, you can get it done. Whether it’s by yourself or with the help of others. You must believe that it can happen. You must let go of that mental interference that tells you that you cant do it because YOU CAN do it. No matter how great or small the task you must believe in yourself to get it done, just take one step at a time, one day at at a time. And let me say this,
Whatever is you want or want to become, stop saying that it “will be” and start claiming that “it is.” For instance
I am rich, I am an author, I am an entrepreneur, I am an incredible parent, I am fearless, I am courageous. You have to start rehearsing in your mind over and over again Who you are, What you want, and that you can accomplish it. Scientist have proven that the words we tell ourselves affect every area of our life. So start visualizing your success, and see yourself executing your plans to completion. Muhammad Ali talked about how he would see himself victorious long before the fight. People thought he was crazy when he say what round he knock his opponent out, or that he called himself the greatest of all time. The truth is that he believed that he was great and he believed that he would be victorious, and as a result every cell in his body went into overdrive to make sure that what he believed in his mind came true In his actions. And the same is possible for you… Your psychology affects your physiology. So start believing in your ability to make things happen and your whole body will ignite to make your beliefs a reality.
The third most essential part of a focused life, not a balanced life, But a focused life is to
3. Be Present
I learned a long time ago that when I’m home with my family they need me to be husband and father, and at times it’s a challenge for me because I work a lot from home. But I’ve learned that when I’m spending time with the family I must be completely present with them. They don’t care about the next business deal, or if was just traveling the world singing or speaking in front of thousands of people. They want Daddy or husband. They need me to help with homework, or go out to dinner, or play and talk. They want me to be present. They need me to be present. And the same works vise versa when Im out coaching, speaking, singing, or doing this video I need to be completely present with you because you deserve great value and I cant give you what you need if I’m not completely present.
When I’m away from home I’m not worried about home, because when I was there I was fully committed, I was totally present. When I leave work I’m not worried about work because when I was there I was fully present and I did what I supposed to do while I was there.
Don’t let multitasking make you believe that you can do it all at the same time because you can’t. Trust me I know, because I’ve tried, and it just doesn’t work. If you are truly committed to having a centered and focused life You must Know what you want, You must believe that you can accomplish your goals no matter how great or small, and you must give yourself the gift of being completely present.